10 Steps To Conquer Perfectionism | World of Psychology

10 Steps To Conquer Perfectionism World of Psychology


10 Steps To Conquer Perfectionism
By Therese J. Borchard May 11, 2009


tackle this adversary every day. And although my inner perfectionist clearly has hold of my brain many days, I do think I am handcuffed less often by the fear of messing up than I used to be. Here are 10 techniques I use to break out of the prison of perfectionism in order to live and create as freely as I can in an imperfect world.>

1. Remove yourself from the competition.... And as a perfectionist, you don’t need folks feeding you the very message you are trying to forget: “you are nothing without total success…. and if you don’t get there, I will!” >

2. Make up some rules.>

3. Do a reality check....distinguish realistic expectations from unrealistic ones. >

4. Return to your exodus moment....when we were freed from fear and crossed the Red Sea of anxiety into a land of peace. >

5. Show your weakness... This is counter-intuitive for most perfectionists. But I can guarantee that you’ll get good results if you try it.... You are real. You feel that way too! So I guess I shouldn’t beat myself up for similar emotions. >

6. Celebrate your mistakes... accept your mistakes. ... each big blunder deserves a round of toasts. Because almost all of them teach us precious, rare lessons that can’t be acquired by success. Nope, the embarrassment, humiliation, self-disgust … all those are tools with which to unearth the gold. >

7. Add some color. Perfectionists are color blind. They see the world in black and white. In order to get a pair of glasses on our inner perfectionist, then, we have to add a few hues to every relationship, event, and goal: we have to become a tad more tolerant of life’s messiness, unresolved issues, and complicated situations that can’t be neatly boxed up. Seeing in color is realizing that even though a certain solution to a problem worked well yesterday, it might not be right for today. >

8. Break the job down... many of us are so petrified of bloopers that we can’t begin the project. “One of the secrets of people who are highly productive is that they rarely try to tackle a difficult job all at once. Instead, they break the task down into its smallest component parts and do one small step a day.” >

9. Be yourself.... “nothing important, or meaningful, or beautiful, or interesting, or great, ever came out of imitations.” >

10. Believe in redemption.identifying the broken places in your heart and in your life can be one of the scariest exercises you ever do, and yet only then can you recognize the grace that comes buried with every hole. If the journey to the Black Hole of despair and back has taught me anything, it’s this: everything is made whole in time … if you can just hang on to the faith, hope, and love in the people and places around you long enough to see the sun rise yourself. Absolutely nothing is forsaken, not even those relationships and memories and persons that you think are lost forever. All things are made right in time. So you don’t always have to get it right on the first try.>

Read full article: http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2009/05/11/10-steps-to-conquer-perfectionism/

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This posting was made my Jim Jacobs, President & CEO of Jacobs Executive Advisors. Jim also serves as Leader of Jacobs Advisors' Insurance Practice.