Turning Complaints Into Commitments *
By Charlie Sheppard *
Underneath their compliant you will need to learn to listen for their
covert unspoken request or commitment. Provide a serial complainer the opportunity to shift their perspective by offering them the gift of your questions. *
Every work place has its chronic complainers. In fact, most organizations have a resident expert skilled in the craft. Complaining seems to be always in style. People spend vast amounts of time complaining. Yet, if you listen for the commitment inside of the complaint it can actually be the inspiration for a new idea or a new way to approach a problem. Noticing what’s wrong takes a certain type of skill. It takes real talent to take what is wrong and discover the gems inside. It is this ability to change the meaning of the complaint that opens up the capacity to discover new opportunities and create change. *
The first thing we need to do is to not think of a complaint as a complaint. Behind every complaint is an idea or a belief or a value that a person is committed to. Otherwise, why be upset? A person who complains about their manager being adversarial might be committed to the idea of having a relationship with their boss where they can discuss issues freely. We need to think of the complaint as something the other person is committed to and we just can’t see it yet. When we only hear the complaint we can be defensive or reactive, and then we then fail to see or hear the real opportunity. The good thing about complaints is that they usually camouflage a deeper underlying commitment. They can be a clumsy expression of what they want or what they are committed to having. For us to help the other person we first have to shift how we are listening to the other person. This is known as reframing. Framing refers to the way a complaint is described; reframing is the process of changing the way the complaint is presented so that it maintains its fundamental meaning but is more likely to support resolution efforts. It can immediately help to reframe the complaint as "This person still cares enough to complain, to invest time, energy and effort in getting something fixed.” *
Loyal customers believe that you want to know what went wrong. When customers take the time to complain they are taking the time to tell you what went wrong with your process, your product or your communication. Customers who are disappointed and do not complain are already lost. You can turn the customer who is still committed enough to you or your product to give you the feedback. Your job is to make sure when they call to leave them feeling understood and that you understand how the service or product did not live up to their expectations. If you can fix the problem for one complaining customer you can build processes and systems to address the issues so they don’t happen again. And a customer who has his or her issues addressed can become one of your strongest advocates. *
When coworkers spend time complaining, it will usually be symptomatic of a larger issue. Perhaps the person feels resigned and doesn’t know how to ask for what they need. Underneath their compliant you will need to learn to listen for their covert unspoken request or commitment. Provide a serial complainer the opportunity to shift their perspective by offering them the gift of your questions. *
When your team member comes to you with a complaint: ***
- Listen beyond the words for the request **
- Look for underlying commitment *
Use the following process to clarify what you think the person is asking for: ***
- Pace the concern (present state) and pace the emotion behind the concern. Verify for understanding: *
- How is this a concern? **
- And how is that an issue? **
- Transition to a positive statement by asking: *
- What would you rather have? *
- Find out what is driving the outcome and what they are committed to having: **
- What would having that do for you? **
- What would that allow you to accomplish? **
- Choose a) or b): *
a) options *
Can we take a look at this together to see what we can do
to solve it? **
Go to brainstorming
solutions *
b) request *
Ask what is it they want to request **
Do you have a request for me about helping resolve this? **
Make sure it is stated in the positive (what they want) *
Once people stop thinking of themselves as complainers and start thinking of themselves as people who are committed to something, the stage is set for them to do something about their problem. That happens by never dismissing the complaint but by finding the commitment behind it. We can use complaining as a catalyst for positive change and positive action in our own lives, at work, and in the world. The key is to turn complaints into commitments.
MCS Consulting, LLC
412 Red Hill Avenue, Suite 21
San Anselmo, CA 94960
Tel (415) 482-1100 Fax (415) 482-1101
Charlie Sheppard is President of Management Communication Systems, Inc., a company on the forefront of next-generation behavioral assessment technologies. MCS is an organizational development consulting company that focuses its efforts on helping organizations create high performance cultures. He brings experience in organizational development, specializing in the assessment, design, and delivery of development programs with an emphasis on strategic alignment, leadership development, team development, and negotiation skills. By developing innovative technologies and delivering creative solutions, MCS is an active partner in the selection process, in the creation of effective teams, and in ongoing organizational development. Charlie coordinates the activities of MCS's consultants and serves the firm as the lead developer of assessment technologies and courseware.
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http://dreamlearndobecome.blogspot.com This posting was made my Jim Jacobs, President & CEO of Jacobs Executive Advisors. Jim also serves as Leader of Jacobs Advisors' Insurance Practice.
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